I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
