Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize
