Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
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