Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
