you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I will pee on everything he values.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
The dick lei will go down in squad history
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
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