didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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