also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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