Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
