Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
