my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
