.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize