You're so nebulous sometimes
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
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woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
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He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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