it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Randomize
