i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
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