Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
