I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize