Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
