Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
