The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
