As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
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