from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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