I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
we're so committed to being not committed
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