Porn is love you can see.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Randomize
