I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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