Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
