the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
