Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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