I'm really into asian looking animals
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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