# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
