that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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