i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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