We should be called the Road Head Warriors
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
