Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize