Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
