I accidentally had phone sex last night
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
