i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
farters have to be the big spoon...
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize