I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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