The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Are my feet made of real feet?
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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