Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
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