Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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