Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
