they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Randomize
