so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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