Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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