so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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