Where did you get a picture of my penis
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize