Kareoke will never be a sober sport
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize