he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I want to be your penis for a week.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
