Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both http://tfl.nu/4hk0
  Replies (9) Good night (3009) Bad night (895)
• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (909): You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish" http://tfl.nu/4kon
  Replies (9) Good night (3595) Bad night (679)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  ID DO HER

  (1-904): View more from Florida

  SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): ID DO HER (1-904): SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK http://tfl.nu/y38s
  Replies (17) Good night (712) Bad night (6690)
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (972): Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy. http://tfl.nu/2xr2
  Replies (52) Good night (1009) Bad night (9670)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now. http://tfl.nu/99sk
  Replies (11) Good night (741) Bad night (3496)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend. http://tfl.nu/wt9b
  Replies (14) Good night (868) Bad night (5155)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays. http://tfl.nu/4je9
  Replies (9) Good night (3053) Bad night (822)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (281): All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems". http://tfl.nu/zcya
  Replies (11) Good night (3763) Bad night (1402)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (403): Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch? http://tfl.nu/fqqa
  Replies (6) Good night (2795) Bad night (1537)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (647): i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces. http://tfl.nu/7l8v
  Replies (3) Good night (3356) Bad night (1106)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever http://tfl.nu/1ydb
  Replies (16) Good night (992) Bad night (3227)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand http://tfl.nu/6s03
  Replies (10) Good night (810) Bad night (1067)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry. http://tfl.nu/xlvi
  Replies (1) Good night (627) Bad night (361)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us. http://tfl.nu/1i5v
  Replies (5) Good night (785) Bad night (237)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at http://tfl.nu/gjoz
  Replies (12) Good night (693) Bad night (265)

Randomize