She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
